turnipville dot comarooski

Dear Sir/Ma’am -

I recognize that you didn’t grow up with computers, and that you’ve been unfairly forced into adopting technology over the last decade. I understand that where file cabinets and Rolodexes fulfilled their roles “just fine”, society’s gone and replaced them with PCs, and PDAs.

It’s a nightmare, I know.

But there is one thing you need to understand…for our sanity.

When you leave your computer powered on, and don’t use it for several minutes, oftentimes the computer will automatically activate a “screen saver”. The screen saver – though not necessary anymore – was created to prevent “burn in” on older monitors; most people use them for entertainment value, but they also have a power saving feature.

You see, most computers will TURN OFF the monitor after several minutes of inactivity (unless you change the settings…we’ll not go there). In order to get the monitor to power back up, you need to do one of a few things:

- Move the mouse
- Press a key on the keyboard
- Click the mouse

You’ll notice that repeatedly smacking the living crap out of your mouse, shaking it violently around, and stamping on the keyboard are NOT options on this list. Rather, once you’ve done one of the APPROVED methods, you’ll need to wait a few seconds…because the monitor has to power back up.

Don’t worry…that little buzz sound that happened when you initially touched the computer was just the monitor powering back up. It’ll be around in a second.

So for GOD’S SAKE: STOP BEATING UP YOUR COMPUTER….THE MONITOR WILL COME ON IN DUE TIME.